Ok, so I have to be careful with my movements these days because I don’t want to aggravate my neck/shoulders/back but I’m still going to be low-key flailing around in celebration of International Dance Day today.
And I hope you’ll do the same because…
Image shows a quote from Lynda Barr that reads “ Any kind of dancing is better than no dancing at all.” and there is a person leaping in the air on the background.
I’m not a great dancer (choreography confounds me) but I thoroughly enjoy galumphing around whenever the mood strikes me. In fact, when I am feeling overwhelmed or that things have gotten too heavy, throwing on a danceable song is one of my go-to ways to release all that ickiness.
One of my favourite photos of all time, me and my Dad dancing at my Auntie Val’s wedding in the late 1970s. Image description: Me, at about age 6, dancing with my Dad on the dance floor at my Aunt’s wedding. I’m wearing a light-coloured sun dress and my blonde hair is in pigtails, my right arm is in front of me at chest height (obviously mid-dance-move) and I’m smiling up at my Daddy. My Dad, also mid-dance move with his right fingers mid-snap, is wearing a light grey suit and his brown hair is a floppy sort of length, is looking down towards me with a good Dad-energy. There are people sitting at tables in the background.
And, apparently my instinct to dance in those situations is a good one. Here are some links to articles and videos about why dancing is good for us – even if our techniques are ridiculous:
Still image shows the title of the video ‘The science of dancing’ next to a silhouette of a dancer who has jumped into the air with her head leaning back. There are chemical symbols in the background.
Still image shows the title of the video “The importance of dancing like an idiot” next to two silhouettes, one solid one in light pink and one white one in scribbled lines.
If you aren’t feeling up to reading or watching a lot today, maybe one of these quotes from Planet of Success will inspire you to dance?
Image description: a quote from Amelia Altwater-Rhodes in white text, the background image is of a person on a skirt dancing on the street. The quote reads: In a society that worships love, freedom, and beauty, dance is sacred. It is a prayer for the future, a remembrance of the past and a joyful exclamation of thanks for the present.”Image description: a quote from Agnes De Mille that reads “To dance is to be out of yourself. Larger, more beautiful, more powerful…this is power, it is glory on earth and it is yours for the taking.” the background is blue (some shapes are visible but I can’t tell what they are.)
And, last but not least, here are a few of my favourite songs to dance to, feel free to borrow them for your own galumphing around:
Bif Naked’s “I love myself today” – Be sure to jump up and down during the jumpy parts. You’ll know ’em when you hear ’em. The still image is a photo of the singer, a woman with chin length black hair and bangs, sitting in the back seat of a car with her (tattooed) right arm on the window ledge and her hand upwards.
Great Big Sea’s “The Night Pat Murphy Died” – apparently this is a very old song but this was the first version I heard. It mentions drinking and wake, so judge yourself accordingly. This is the song my sisters and I dance to at weddings -we need a lot of room for this level of galumphing. The still image is a brightly coloured plastic doll of a guy playing the accordion. The background is yellow and the album name ‘play’ is on the right.
Charming Disaster’s “Baba Yaga” – the catchy tune, the folklore, and the clever lyrics makes this one of my favourite songs. Excellent for dancing in the kitchen or in the car. The still image is of three odd folk art dolls with the name of the band and the song superimposed on the image.
Soft Cell’s “Tainted Love” – This is a great song for goofing around with my friends. We have a dance for this one that is reminiscent of dancing on someone’s lawn in the summer when you’re 10 years old. Still image shows the singers face in a celestial setting.
Elle Kings “Ex’s & Oh’s” (the apostrophes are hers, not mine) – This is another song for goofing around and I like the snarky lyrics. Still image is of the album cover with the singer looking over her shoulder at the camera. She has blonde hair, defined eye makeup and she is wearing a multi-coloured shirt.
How will *you* be celebrating International Dance Day?
My continuing quest to improve my posture and knee health has taken me down the weird road of re-learning to walk. I didn’t quite realize that was what I was doing until I read Breath, by James Nestor. He writes about a multi-year drought project to learn about breathing, and how it has affected his health.
Obviously, I know how to walk. What I’m less good at is walking with my shoulders back, my torso lifted, and my head and feet at optimal angles. My new habit is to walk during my shifts on desk at the pool. I wiggle my shoulders to remind them to be wide both front and back. I peek at my reflection to make sure my feet are facing forward, rather than turned out like a duck’s.
I walk backwards sometimes (most of the benefits may be overstated, but it’s a good way for me to keep scanning the pool as I move around). I walk sideways. Sometimes I stop and go up on my toes 20 times, or do little leg lifts.
A Lego image of a lifeguard wearing a red bathing suit and pinny.
Similarly, I am trying a few of the techniques in Breath. I breathe in through my nose and exhale slowly out my mouth as much as possible when exercising. Sometimes I try box breathing, especially when I’m trying to relax. Occasionally, I’ll even do a bit of yoga alternate nostril breathing. The rest of the time, I focus on breathing only through my nose, at least when I’m awake. I have not yet resorted to taping or strapping my mouth shut for sleep, though I confess to having considered it.
Mina wrote recently about some of the alternative medicine things she is trying alongside her prescription medications. I thought it was an interesting approach.
Like Mina, I’m just doing them as entertaining supplements to my physiotherapy and prescribed medications. I think they’re helping a little. If not, that’s fine; they won’t hurt me (as long as I don’t trip).
I have a terrific physiotherapist who has been helping me with hip and shoulder issues of the past few months. I almost didn’t go to her because her profile at the clinic says she likes to work with athletes.
Red flag of imposter syndrome!
I went to the other physiotherapist at the same clinic instead, up until she went on maternity leave. Then I debated going to another clinic, but finally decided to be brave and see Emma.
I’m glad I did. It turns out that Emma is really good at listening to what I say about the activities I enjoy, and helping me find exercises that not only make me better at those things, but are exercises that may already be somewhat familiar.
A couple of examples for you, related to strengthening my glutes: lying on the ground and doing lifts while wearing a band is great, but standing at the ballet barre and doing a similar move while lifting up my core until I feel the glutes engage (just like I need to do in ballet class but often don’t) is also really good. Similarly, doing clamshells while wearing a band activates the same glute muscles I should be using when I do whip kick in the pool. If I adjust my swim to make sure I’m doing that, it totally counts toward physio.
I have written before about how important it is for me to use mental images to help me position my body correctly. The more I have worked with Emma, the better I have gotten at feeling what parts of me need work and how to get them engaged.
It’s still a work in progress, but I’m feeling much better about my balance, posture, and the state of my knees than I did when I first started going to physiotherapy as a somewhat broken older woman who was afraid of falling. So good, in fact, that this week Emma sent me off with no follow-up appointments. I will check in for a tune-up when needed, but I no longer need her regular supervision. Yay!
There will definitely be tune-ups; I’m still really bad at moderation and will undoubtedly overdo some sport or other.
Diane in a colourful hat and coat at a small skating rink. It was the first time skating in at least three years, and came on the heels of two dance classes and two hard swim workouts. Ow, but so much fun!
Image description: Outside shot of a woman (Christine) with dark medium long hair and wearing a short-sleeved shirt, holding a young boy while he climbs on a rope climber in a playground, with dappled light, a fence, and a tree in the background. She is looking up at the boy and the boy is looking up at the next rung of the rope. Photo credit: Viceth Vong.
“Why aren’t you doing another triathlon this year?” an acquaintance asked.
I gulped. “I’m having some, uh, health issues,” I said. I was keeping things vague out of necessity—I had no damn idea what was happening, only that I had a constant (and I mean 100% of the time) headache that reached an unbearable level by the time I left work for the day. I went to sleep pretty much as soon as I got home—not only because being in pain is exhausting, but because sleep was the only time I didn’t feel awful. My life goals had gone from: publish a book, rock my career in publishing, and finish a tri even though I can barely swim, to: get through the day.
In the year after the pain started, I had test after test. They all came back negative, which was a good thing on the one hand (who wants to have a brain tumor or Lyme disease), and utterly frustrating on the other. After each of my appointments at Boston’s various prestige medical clinics, I wanted to scream, Why can’t you just tell me what was wrong with me?
Eventually, through a process of elimination, they diagnosed me with occipital neuralgia (nerve pain in the upper neck) and idiopathic chronic migraines (idiopathic just means that they have no flipping idea why it’s happening.) I tried treatment after treatment (Botox injections, handfuls of pills, various psychologic therapies) but the headaches wouldn’t budge. I was in bed for the vast majority of most days. The body I toned through hours of training atrophied.
Eventually I went to the Cleveland Clinic for a three-week “headache camp,” as a friend called it. There they tweaked my medications but more importantly, they taught me more than I could’ve imagined about headaches and how to maneuver your lifestyle to live with—and hopefully eventually prevent—them.
One of their prescriptions was to get back to exercising. I had all but stopped as the pain consumed me. There were a few scientifically backed reasons for this recommendation: exercise has been shown to reduce the severity of pain in people with many chronic pain conditions; it also greatly helps with the anxiety and depression that often hits people with chronic illnesses of all stripes (and that certainly hit me).
For me, it also allowed me to get back in touch with that former triathaloning self. I started with walking—an exercise I still love. I added yoga and light weight training. Slowly but surely, I started to feel better physically and emotionally. Now, I walk for an hour a few times a week, do pilates at least once a week, and I’m currently attempting to reintroduce weight training after that fell out of my routine. On days I exercise, I feel less achey—and also like my body is my friend again, not something that revolted against me. I feel, too, that I am strong—I hadn’t realized how upsetting it was to my sense of self to think of myself as weak. Now, I am not just someone with a disabling condition, I am someone who can keep up with her son on the playground, who can squat down and lift his four-year-old body, who doesn’t have to fear the idea of trudging around a theme park all day.
I have greater exercise ambitions, too: I plan to conquer a ten-mile hike in the next few months, and an even longer one by the end of the year, with the eventual goal of walking 100 miles or so on Europe’s El Camino Santiago. I have no thoughts of trying for another triathlon, but thanks in part to regular, light exercise, I’m doing much more than just getting through the day now.
If you have a story about exercising during or after illness, we’d love to hear it!
Christine Junge is a writer living in San Jose, CA. She’s currently working on a novel, and blogs about parenting with a chronic illness/disability at ThanksForNothingBody.substack.com
I had a hard time getting out of bed Monday morning. Winter weather. Less light. Cold room. Early hour. Big work week ahead. Feeling kind of stiff.
And one great reason to stay in bed: Warm blankets.
I put off rising by scrolling through a few photos from the weekend when my friend, Kimi (who recently travelled to Turkey), made us a great Turkish-style brunch with simple but fresh and delicious foods: simit (a sesame crusted bagel), menemen (an egg and tomato dish), clotted cream and honey, tahini and molasses, cheeses, fruits, Nutella, crusty bread, and Turkish tea. Easy to make, eat with your hands, and enjoy many cute little ramekin dishes! After our feast, she gave me some of our leftovers.
Turkish-style breakfast for two. All the cutlery was placed by me; turns out it was not needed because you are supposed to grab things with your hands or with the crusty bread.
In my bed nest, looking at the photos, I thought: I could make breakfast today. But I almost never make breakfast during the week, even when I work from home.
So that is what I decided to do. Instead of heading straight to my desk with a cup of black coffee sloshing in one hand and store-bought granola in another, I made myself leftover Turkish-style breakfast and a half carafe of tea. A decadent breakfast by my weekday standards.
A smaller but still exciting leftover Turkish-style breakfast for one. Notice the lack of unnecessary cutlery this time.
As I munched, I mused over how I have periodically tried to motivate myself to rise early with exercise: stretching, YouTube dancing, around the block walking. This time last year I was training for a Ho Ho Ho holiday run. But I haven’t loved AM exercise enough to stick with it; plus, for me PM exercise feels good for unwinding from the day.
While I have had many noble starts with early morning exercise, I could not remember the last time I got up early on a weekday intending to eat a great breakfast. But Turkish-style breakfast was awesome: I was fuelled all day (sustained by the caffeine infusion of clove tea).
A carafe of loose black tea in a small bell tea cup.
I share this story as an idea and as permission: if you wake up and you don’t feel motivated by what usually gets you out of bed…try making yourself an awesome and unexpected breakfast.
Toothbrushing, morning stretches, reaching out to a loved one, pet care, awesome breakfast: what gets you jumping out of bed in the morning to face the day?
Way back when I started seeing a physiotherapist, my biggest complaint was my knees. However, my shoulder that became a frozen shoulder and torn rotator cuff trumped the knee issues. But now that the shoulder is in good shape and I know how to keep it that way, we are finally returning to my knees.
Step one: assessment that confirms the crunching and grinding I hear when I bend is not normal. To do: book an appointment with my doctor to see about getting a proper assessment for arthritis.
Step two: test the muscles surrounding my knees to figure out what else is going on. The constant quad and IT band pain are also not normal, and they are impeding my ability to stand up unassisted, or even use the stairs comfortably.
Diagnosis so far? Quads that are massively overcompensating for my underperforming glutes. So tight, in fact, that my quads are pulling my kneecaps up and out of alignment. they are probably a significant factor in causing my bunions, too.
My immediate future looks like a lot of clamshells using a band, leg lifts slightly to the back to engage and strengthen my glute and hamstring muscles.
Not like this! Four images of Jane Fonda doing various leg lifts in the early 1970s, complete with skimpy body suit and leg warmers.
There will also sessions with a rolling pin, and just hanging around with my leg elevated behind me to stretch out those quads.
So far, my lifts are very tiny. Sometimes it feels like I am only thinking about lifting the leg, not moving at all. But my butt has definitely been engaged!
What do I hope to achieve? Deeper pliés in dance class, a decent flutter kick when swimming, and knees and feet that don’t hurt every time I move. Honestly, I would settle for the last two.
I know this sounds like a Christmas post but that’s by coincidence not by design.
Thanks to an off-hand reference on a TV show on the weekend, my family ended up talking about what we would ask for if we were granted one wish.
An artfully lit photo of a brass genie-style lamp with a raised design, a loop at one end for holding it, a sort of spout at the other end and a little conical top. The lamp is sitting on a shelf or table.
After we did the usual rounds of wishing for peace, wishing for wealth, and wishing for super powers (one of us would like to fly, another would like to be able to turn invisible, and I’d like to have to power to calm an anxious crowd – big shock there, hey?), we got into a certain type of more specific wish and I surprised myself with my answer.
It was one of those situations where I don’t remember ever thinking this before* but I was intrigued once I said it.
My wish was to be already 6 weeks into a fitness routine – a well-established practice, the challenges of fitting it into my schedule already behind me, starting to feel some results, the aches and pains of new movements already done.
The thought of being able to step into that point without the specific challenges of the early part of the process is incredibly appealing.
It’s not that I don’t want to work hard, I am totally willing to do that, but since all of my efforts to establish habits involve the extra loops and challenges that my ADHD throws at me, I find that there are more mental layers for me during those first few weeks than I hear about from other people.
My friends will report a reluctance to get started or some resistance to the activity itself or muscle soreness or whatever and I get all of that plus a lot of second-guessing, a lot of task initiation problems, a lot of overthinking about every part of the task, and a lot of internal pressure not to be wasting time if my efforts don’t pay off quickly.
Now that I have had that wish pop up, though, I am thinking about this whole thing differently.
I know that I can’t actually wish myself into that 6 week point but what can I do to help myself have some of that 6 week feeling sooner rather than later?
Is there something I can be doing now to help smooth the path to that feeling?
What can I do to give myself some relief from the endless loops that my brain goes through during that first part of a new program?
I don’t have the answers to all of those questions, of course, but I am going to figure them out.
And I will happily read any suggestions you put in the comments – as long as they don’t include ‘you just need to buckle down and do it’. I know that one and it doesn’t help. If perseverance was the answer, I would be the fittest person in the world by this point
ALSO, I would love to hear your fitness wishes!
What would you like to be able to do?
What would you like to make easier for yourself?
What would you magic into existence fitness-wise?
*Note: Given my ADHD and the way that brains work in general, I am not claiming that I have NEVER thought this before. I just don’t remember thinking it.
You are the people who don’t take advantage of your glide in breast stroke. Who walk in the lane rather than swimming. Who do some sort of head’s down dog-paddle. Or who do very short strokes and over-cross your arms in freestyle. Or who don’t follow every movement in aqua fit class. Or take it easy instead of pushing yourself throughout.
But you show up every single session and do your workout, whatever it may be. Already I recognize and expect to see you when I’m lifeguarding.
If I were you, I would welcome coaching or lessons because improving my strokes and speed are constant goals. But you seem happy to be moving through the water, and that’s the important thing.
You demonstrate discipline I don’t have, just by showing up every day.
Older women smiling and laughing during a water aerobics class. Photo from oldldadygains.com
I started this post in my head while I drew our gold star and I started with a very different idea…
But once I finished our star, I realized that she looks so celebratory that I wanted to look for extra reasons for her to feel that way.
So, my friends, I’m hoping you will help her out by looking for things to celebrate in your life right now.
I’m not asking you to pretend that your frustrations and challenges or even your anger don’t exist.
I’m asking you to give yourself a moment, a breather, a chance to focus on something that is going right, even if it is a tiny thing.
Because I feel that taking a few minutes to focus on something good, something celebratory, can help fuel your resolve for dealing with everything else.
And because it feels good to look on the bright side when you can, even if it is just briefly.
So maybe your meditation felt good this morning – celebrate!
Maybe you can lift with just a little more ease – celebrate!
Maybe your friend can join you on your walk today – celebrate!
Maybe that ache in your heel has lessened a bit- celebrate!
Maybe your new dance steps were a little less confusing than they were last time – celebrate!
Or, maybe, like me, you are finding it easier to get back into the rhythm of taekwondo than you thought you would – a definite cause for celebration for me!
I dare you, I welcome you, I invite you to take just a glimpse toward what is going right and give it a grin and a happy nod.
Go You!
Go Team!
Here, of course, is your gold star for your efforts!
Image description: a cartoonish gold star drawn on a white square. The gold star has a happy expression and is trimmed in light green with a black outline. The background of the image is covered in tiny green dots and the paper is framed in green with black trim.
Sam invited me years ago to guest blog on FIFI, and back then as someone in her late 30s I’d wondered how my musings would fit as a not-quite-yet “midlife” feminist. Aside from her forward thinking (as of course we all grow into middle age), while planning for holiday travel recently I’d realized that perhaps I had finally made it to mid-life. Why? Because I was, for the first time, packing two of things.
I like to exercise to music, but what if my lightning charge cable breaks? Solution: Bring two. What if the busted sneakers I usually bring don’t have treads for the hike I want to do? Answer: Bring a second pair. What if the luggage with my swimming towel doesn’t arrive? Remedy: pack my microfibre travel towel (when I know towels will be available). What if I run out of face 60 SPF while I’m out in the sun. Yes: Pack a second bottle.
A few years ago I blogged about treetop adventures and my reflections on realizations about value of preventative injury measures and safety thinking. Admittedly, for most of my life I have never had a “safety first” attitude (sorry mom). Due to youth, inexperience, and limited financial means I’ve usually winged it with what I had, or I just went without.
These days, in contrast, I’ve noticed my brain has been thinking ahead: planning back ups and paying more attention to minimizing risk. Is it because I can financially afford doubles of stuff, I’ve become wiser in my older age, or I’ve eventually learned from my mistakes?
It’s probably a combination. It’s pretty neat, this sudden impulse to be more prepared, because I know as I grow older I know I can less afford to be injured, and the added preparation measures give me more piece of mind (even with slightly heavier luggage).
My goal is not to reinforce stereotype about middle age. I can see how these “solutions” tend towards comfort, even excess. And I am sure there are plenty of free spirits who are reading this and, out of necessity or confidence, connect with very little of it. I celebrate you!
But today, I recognize it’s a privilege to be able to bring two of what I might (or might not) need for my holiday fitness activities, and I am appreciating that, for probably the first time, I am caring for myself in this new way.
So, as I move steadily into the middle of my midlife, I find myself twice grateful for such abundance. 💜
