Depending on how you organize your calendar (and where you are in the world!) we’re either starting a new week or about to start one.
Either way, as you look to the week ahead, I hope you are able to imagine a little extra space for yourself in there. Not extra space to do more stuff, extra space for you to spend in a restful, restorative way.
I know it can be hard to fit that into your busy schedule but I hope you can figure out a way to fit yourself into your days.
I wish you ease with the process.
Today, we’re starting with a 5 Minute Full Body Stretch from Yoga with Adriene.
The still image is of Adriene, a woman with light skin and long brown hair who is wearing leggings and a tshirt, balancing on her left hand and her right knee while she extends her left leg behind her and her right arm in front of her. Her dog, Benji, is asleep on his side near her yoga mat.
And here’s a 3 Minute Guided Mindfulness Meditation from Haven Inspired.
Still image description: On the left side of the image is a woman with brown skin with elaborate tattoos on her shoulders. She has her hair pinned up on top of her head and her eyes are closed. She looks very peaceful. On the right side is the title of the video, the title of the channel, and the word subscribe with an image of the subscription button next to it.
About Making Space 2023:
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating.
In 2021, I started doing daily December reminders with a post called Give Yourself Some Space, and that’s how the ‘Making Space‘ December tradition began. Throughout December 2021 and 2022, I wrote a short post that included two videos – one for exercise and one for meditation – and a bit of encouragement for you to make space for yourself at this busy time of year.
These posts are not about cramming more things into your month, they reminding you that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and that you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need at the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day. Just do whatever you can to give yourself a little more breathing room.
So, some of these posts may be long and some may be short but please know that every single one of them is written with the hope that you can find a little ease in your day, whatever that looks like for you.
Oh, I just caught myself spending entirely too much time trying come up with a good opening paragraph for today’s post.
It’s way too easy to fall into those sorts of thinking habits isn’t it?
Even though I know that done beats perfect every time, I still fall for that ‘gotta get it right’ trick.
As if there is only one right way to start this post instead there being many, many ways to get started. And most of those many, many ways would work out just fine.
So, my friends, please learn from my mistake today.
Don’t fall into the trap of trying to get everything right.
Instead, let yourself get started any old way you can AND try to accept that good enough is, indeed, good enough.
Is this the best post I have ever written?
Definitely not.
Does it get the message across AND include two videos for you to use to make a little space for yourself today?
It does!
Good luck with making space today, everyone.
Our first video today is from Yes2Next and they are leading you through a 10 Minute Gentle Brain-Body Workout.
Still image features the video title on the left and, on the right, the mother-daughter hosts are seated in chairs with one arm in the air and the opposite leg extended. The mother is an elderly woman in a black tracksuit with short grey hair and glasses. The daughter is a middle aged woman in a pink shirt and black pants with her greying hair in ponytail. They are both smiling.
And for our meditation today, we have a 2-Minute Focus Reset from Headspace. There are a couple of pauses in here when the instructor is giving the listener a moment longer than expected to follow the instructions so don’t worry that the video has stopped!
Still image features the video title in white and pink text on the left and concentric purple circles with a wedge of white/grey on the right. In the centre of the circle is a happy face with closed eyes.
About Making Space 2023:
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating.
In 2021, I started doing daily December reminders with a post called Give Yourself Some Space, and that’s how the ‘Making Space‘ December tradition began. Throughout December 2021 and 2022, I wrote a short post that included two videos – one for exercise and one for meditation – and a bit of encouragement for you to make space for yourself at this busy time of year.
These posts are not about cramming more things into your month, they reminding you that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and that you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need at the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day. Just do whatever you can to give yourself a little more breathing room.
So, some of these posts may be long and some may be short but please know that every single one of them is written with the hope that you can find a little ease in your day, whatever that looks like for you.
I don’t know about you but I could use a little energy boost right now so I picked out two energy focused videos for today.
Here’s a 5 minute meditation for Feeling Full of Energy from Great Meditation:
Still image is a cartoon drawing of a person with light brown skin and long dark hair, their eyes are closed and they look peaceful. There’s a semi-circular mandala-style drawing in shades of orange behind their head.
And here’s a 1 Minute Energy Booster workout from Lucy Wyndham-Read:
Still image is a black and white photo of the instructor, a white woman, in exercise clothes reaching her right arm toward her right foot while she looks downward, her left arm is extended upwards and behind her. The title of the video is in red and black next to the photo.
At this point in the year, our weekends really get packed with various tasks – fun and otherwise – and it can be extra tricky to make space for ourselves. When you are planning out your weekend, please try to keep an eye on your energy levels and see when, where, and how you might be able to take a few minutes to catch your breath – literally and metaphorically.
About Making Space 2023:
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating.
In 2021, I started doing daily December reminders with a post called Give Yourself Some Space, and that’s how the ‘Making Space‘ December tradition began. Throughout December 2021 and 2022, I wrote a short post that included two videos – one for exercise and one for meditation – and a bit of encouragement for you to make space for yourself at this busy time of year.
These posts are not about cramming more things into your month, they reminding you that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and that you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need at the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day. Just do whatever you can to give yourself a little more breathing room.
So, some of these posts may be long and some may be short but please know that every single one of them is written with the hope that you can find a little ease in your day, whatever that looks like for you.
Since we have already focused on hands, let’s put our best foot forward for Day 6.
If you aren’t up to putting your *best* foot forward, just put your okayest foot forward or just put one foot in front of the other.
The idea that we have to be at our best all the time is nonsense.
Sometimes we are at our best, sometimes we are at our okayest, sometimes we just show up, and sometimes we choose to rest – all of those things are good choices, depending on the day and on the resources available to us in the moment.
Wow, that was kind of a long tangent from an offhand segue from hands to feet, hey? Such are the perils of reading my writing!
So, before you can put any foot of any kind forward, it’s a good idea to make sure that our feet are rested and relaxed. That’s where this video from the Yoga with Bird YouTube Channel comes in.
The still image for this video shows the instructor, Bird, sitting cross-legged and massaging her right foot with both hands. She is sitting on a brown yoga mat and there are plants in the background.
I have been running (ha!) with the feet theme so I wanted to use a walking meditation for today but I was concerned about the lack of inclusivity in that idea. So, you can imagine how thrilled I was to find this meditation from the National Center on Health, Physical Activity and Disability‘s channel that is actually inclusive of people who use wheelchairs or move in ways that don’t include walking.
The still image for this video is a photo at ground height, with a path and plants seen through the silhouette of the wheels of a wheelchair.
About Making Space 2023:
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating.
In 2021, I started doing daily December reminders with a post called Give Yourself Some Space, and that’s how the ‘Making Space‘ December tradition began. Throughout December 2021 and 2022, I wrote a short post that included two videos – one for exercise and one for meditation – and a bit of encouragement for you to make space for yourself at this busy time of year.
These posts are not about cramming more things into your month, they reminding you that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and that you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need at the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day. Just do whatever you can to give yourself a little more breathing room.
So, some of these posts may be long and some may be short but please know that every single one of them is written with the hope that you can find a little ease in your day, whatever that looks like for you.
In this past week, I have been experimenting with my schedule to see how to create the softest day for myself.
To be clear, the softest day has nothing to do with whether I have work to do, it’s actually about minimizing any time-related stress and static. And I don’t mean stress and static from other people, I’m trying to work more cooperatively with my own brain here.
I’m figuring out at which point in the day my regular activities feel easiest or most straightforward. Or, to put it another way, when do these activities require the least thought and effort?
This will take longer than a week to figure out, of course, but I have to start somewhere.
Here’s what I’ve found out so far:
1- There are a lot of benefits to walking the dog earlier in the day.
Generally, unless I have a commitment that affects my schedule, I walk the dog either right after lunch or when I finish work for the day. Recently though, I have been walking her right after breakfast and before I start work and it’s been great.
Walking Khalee earlier means:
I have a clear time to start my work day (I work from home so this has always been a challenge.)
I don’t have to wonder when will be the best time to head out for our walk (my brain will mull that over all day if I let it.)
I get a good brain boost from the exercise (I can always use a bit more focus.)
I can free up my late afternoons for other things.
2 – I can get a lot done between 4:00-5:30PM.
I had a hint of this a few weeks back when I had some afternoon meetings and I had to shift my work later in the day. (I had walked the dog right before lunch a couple of days in a row so the end of the day was free.) I have always been trying to end my day around 4:00 or 4:30, thinking that it would be good to have the work day behind me as soon as possible.
Instead, it turns out that putting some of my ‘after work’ tasks in the middle of the day so I can work (especially on my writing) between 4:00-5:30pm is a really good idea. I don’t know if my brain just likes the break from work in the middle of the day or if it likes the ‘deadline’ feeling of 5:30pm (my husband and son finish work at 5:30 at get home at 5:45) but, either way, it seems to work. I feel really focused and determined at that time of day and I finish my work feeling good about it.
Oddly, I have also found that working until 5:30pm makes it a lot easier to head out for any evening commitments, too. I guess that supper feels like a break rather than feeling like the end of the day so my brain doesn’t mind doing something else afterwards?
3- I like doing yoga first thing in the morning AND right before bed.
As you can see, Khalee also likes to do yoga first thing. Image description: A photo of Khalee, a light haired dog, resting on my yoga mat. Our couch, book shelf, and lit Christmas tree are in the background of the photo.
Doing a little yoga when I first go downstairs in the morning feels good and helps me adjust to being awake. Doing a longer yoga session before I head to bed helps my brain tuck away the details of the day and helps me feel more rested.
Neither of these things are huge revelations but I was paying closer attention this past week and I really can tell that it is good for me to bookend my day that way.
Softer but still a ways to go
It’s obviously going to take more than a couple of weeks to undo the stress and challenges of a whole year. Being in stress mode is a habit now and it takes a while to unlearn a habit.
I am making progress though and I feel like I am learning some really important things about my schedule and about my approach to my day to day life.
The softening continues!
Wondering what this Finishing Soft business is all about?
I don’t know about you but when I am trying to make space for myself, I often think really big – I want to get away for the day or I want 3 or 4 hours to work on a project. And that’s great when it can happen but, for me at least, that’s very unlikely at this time of year.
I have to keep reminding myself that creating a little bit of space for myself is helpful and helps me feel more relaxed and focused.
So, in keeping with that note-to-self, today’s videos are short and focused on your hands.
(insert your own hand-related joke here. Some suggestions: We have to take a hands-on approach to making space! Hands up if you want a little space! I’m getting a grip on this making space thing! These videos are handy!)
Anyway, Team, please take good care of yourself today. Even if the only space you can create is for an extra deep breath.
Still image: The instructor, a woman with brown hair in a low ponytail that is swept forward over her shoulder, is standing facing the camera with her back to two windows. Her forearms are raised almost to shoulder height and she has her fingers curled slightly as if she is in the middle of wiggling them.
In keeping with today’s focus on hands, in this video from massage therapist Rachel Richards, she demonstrates ‘5 Finger Breathing’ a relaxation technique in which you move your opposite index finger along your hand while breathing in a specific pattern.
Still image: a woman with long brown hair is sitting with hands up next to her face. One hand is open, palm to the camera, and she has the index finger of her other hand extended to touch her opposite hand.
About Making Space 2023:
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating.
In 2021, I started doing daily December reminders with a post called Give Yourself Some Space, and that’s how the ‘Making Space‘ December tradition began. Throughout December 2021 and 2022, I wrote a short post that included two videos – one for exercise and one for meditation – and a bit of encouragement for you to make space for yourself at this busy time of year.
These posts are not about cramming more things into your month, they reminding you that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and that you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need at the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day. Just do whatever you can to give yourself a little more breathing room.
So, some of these posts may be long and some may be short but please know that every single one of them is written with the hope that you can find a little ease in your day, whatever that looks like for you.
Yes, I know that may feel impossible right now. Yes, I know you may have a lot to do.
But, you know what?
You don’t have to wear yourself out in order to get that stuff done.
You deserve time to yourself, time to take care of yourself, time to do something that makes you feel more like you.
You deserve to have space in your own life.
I took this on my walk with Khalee on Thursday morning. I felt really happy and restful as I was strolling along and I wanted to capture an image that would conjure up those feelings for me again. Image description: a photo taken from the sidewalk facing towards the back of someone’s house. There are a lot of snow-covered trees and a stretch of snow-covered ground between me and their fence and the sun is shining between the trees onto the snow. The photo has a crisp feeling to it.
Whether you are finishing up stuff for the end of the year, preparing for a holiday or just slogging through a bunch of regular stuff, this time of year feels busy and the busy-ness will try to creep into every spare second.
If you wait for free time to appear before you do things for yourself, you’ll be waiting a long time.
But if you create some space – even just by pausing for an extra long breath, by doing one less thing, by looking for places where things can be dialed back a little – you can have a little time for yourself much sooner.
Now, to be clear, I know there are difficult situations in which there is literally no way for someone to create space for themselves and I am truly sorry if you are in one of those times right now. I wish you ease and peace of mind as you make your way through your challenges.
However, for most of us, this rushed and busy season can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. The fact that it feels busy adds to the busy-ness. The ambient stress adds to our stress. Our crowded schedules make our brains feel even more crowded than they need to be.
Now, I’m NOT saying that finding a little space for yourself will make life easy.
And I’m NOT saying that meditation and exercise will clear your schedule.
What I’m saying is that making space for yourself in your own life will make all it easier to handle everything else.
Making space for yourself will help you feel a little better, even if nothing else changes.
BUT
This isn’t a group challenge.
This isn’t another to do list item.
These posts are an offering – two small ways that you can find a little space each day in December.
You can take them, you can leave them, or you can do something else.
No matter what you choose or don’t choose, I am here to cheer you on and remind you that your needs matter – especially at this busy time of year.
I have a bit more explanation and a few useful links in the ‘About Making Space 2023’ section below but let’s get started with our meditation and exercise, shall we?
A 3-minute meditation exercise for beginners. Still image is of a yellow circle hovering above a green wavy horizon.
And while most of you are probably already out of bed, maybe you could manage a little bit of a lie-down while you give these stretches from Ask Dr Jo a try?
A video entitled ‘Stop Morning Back Pain: 3 Simple Stretches You Can Do In Bed.’ Still image shows the instructor Dr. Jo wearing grey track pants and blue shirt, lying on her back on a bed. She has one knee bent with her foot flat on the bed and the other knee lifted toward her chest with her foot in the air and her toes pointing upward.
About Making Space 2023:
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating.
In 2021, I started doing daily December reminders with a post called Give Yourself Some Space, and that’s how the ‘Making Space‘ December tradition began. Throughout December 2021 and 2022, I wrote a short post that included two videos – one for exercise and one for meditation – and a bit of encouragement for you to make space for yourself at this busy time of year.
These posts are not about cramming more things into your month, they reminding you that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and that you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need at the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day. Just do whatever you can to give yourself a little more breathing room.
So, some of these posts may be long and some may be short but please know that every single one of them is written with the hope that you can find a little ease in your day, whatever that looks like for you.
PS – If you are already feeling overwhelmed by the thought of the month ahead, you might find this old article of mine helpful. December is like a messy closet, here’s how to get it back on track. I’m not actually too concerned with you being ‘on track’ but I do want you to have peace of mind and I hope the suggestions in that piece can help you move in that direction.
Last week, I wrote about my conscious decision to finish 2023 soft but as we all know, there’s a big difference between wanting things to be soft and actually making them that way.
Here’s how it’s going so far:
Intention
Even though my intention to finish soft is just the first step in the process, it is an important one.
Knowing that I want to steer toward a particular feeling, to aim for more rest and relaxation, takes a lot of pressure off and helps me avoid that vague, looming sense that I *should* be working harder.
Delegation
I had to make some tough decisions about what I could actually get done, what could wait, and what I could delegate. And I had to make sure that I didn’t wear myself down with the process of decision-making.
My solution was pick the things that loomed the largest and make those decisions first. I decided to schedule some of the other decisions for this week. And others will wait until the relevant situations arise.
Active Rest
I know all about active rest as part of a fitness routine but I only recently thought to apply it to regular old resting. I’m not claiming this as a brand new idea or anything but it has been a useful framework this past week so bear with me.
I’ve written before about how just ‘doing nothing’ is not very restful for me and I knew that I would have to make some clear choices about what rest and relaxation were going to look like for me.
I also knew that really resting, actually letting my nervous system relax, was going to involve more than dialing back my activities. Instead I would have to consciously choose active rest – activities that would quiet my mind, slow my heart rate, let me shed some of the ambient stress of this year.
Yoga and meditation are obvious choices here and I have been choosing videos and audio practices that emphasize the feelings I’m looking for. My search fields are now autogenerating words like ‘reset’, ‘soothing’, and ‘restful.’
Drawing – especially repetitive patterns – can also fall into the active rest category and I have been doing a fair bit of that.
And I have been doing a bit more reading (mystery stories!) and listening to cello music both of which bring a lovely sense of overall calm.
And I think that doing jigsaw puzzles will help, too, but I haven’t gotten around to those. I’ll let you know how that goes.
Softening
Obviously, I can’t say that I’m soft yet, it’s only been a week.
I think, though, that I am softening, at least a little.
Welcome to almost winter. A few months ago I wrote about how I use various health and fitness tracking apps. One of them is Nature Dose. At the time, I was easily hitting 800-900 minutes per week; the goal was 90.
Now, I’m averaging 100-200 minutes, and one week I only managed 50 (I had a huge cooking project and didn’t make it out of the house for three days in a row).
Some of that might because I’m leaving work after dark. Or maybe my phone doesn’t pick up the light while tucked in a pocket under multiple layers of clothing. It’s definitely because I’m not spending hours in the garden or camping or swimming outdoors.
My Nature Dose eexceeds the minimum, but it doesn’t feel like enough to me. The fresh air and natural light (even on a grey rainy day) make me feel more energetic yet calm. My brain slows down to enjoy the scenery and I arrive at my destination refreshed.
I’m almost looking forward to colder weather and snow so I can do a bit of cross country skiing or skating, instead of just biking everywhere – even though that is still tons of fun.
Six people of various ages ride their bikes down a snowy groomed path in Edmonton. Photo: WinterCity Edmonton.ca
I’m not stuck on one particular task or in one area of life. I’m not frozen in place.
I’m just kind of metaphorically walking through mud in the various things I’m trying to do, even the routine stuff
This isn’t a crisis situation. I am not in any particular despair. I’m just moving reaaaaaaaaaallllllllyyy slowly.
And I’m trying to just let myself move that way.
I’m trying to avoid the temptation to just push harder.
I’m trying to take it easy on myself, to just keep inching forward, sticking to whatever version of my routines feels do-able on a given day, and trying my okayest for everything I have to do.
We don’t have to push ourselves in every area of our lives every day.
Sometimes, we can just move a little bit at a time.
So, Team, if you’re feeling a bit stuck, a bit slow, if you’re not seeing any progress, I invite you to join me being kind to yourself about it while you just inch forward.
In fact, it’s okay if you centimetre forward or millimetre forward or just wait for a minute while you catch your metaphorical breath.
And I’m offering you this gold star in recognition of your hard work – whatever that work looks like today, or tomorrow, or whenever.
A drawing of a star outlined in black and filled with concentric circles of gold. Speckles of gold decorate the paper around the star and the whole drawing is resting on a dark blue surface with blue shapes in a slightly lighter blue.
