Today seems like a great day for some restful self care.
Hmm, that’s misleading. I think EVERY day is a good day for restful self-care, and active self-care, and, well, any kind of self-care at all, really.
ANYWAY, on to my point…
We are just a few days from the end of the year, and a few days from the end of a busy month. Instead of thinking in terms of getting more done or cramming more things into our day/week/month/year, I’d like us to be thinking about how to take things slowly, how to ease forward.
And, of course, I’d like us all to be kind to ourselves while we do that. 🌟💚
Here are two videos to help us to be kind and loving towards ourselves as we take things as slowly as we can.
PS – Martha’s delightful 2020 Wellness Calendar posts ended with a round-up post on December 26, 2020. So I am flying solo from here on in.
Jessamine Stanley’s 8-Minute Yoga for Self-Love from the Health Magazine YouTube channel. Still image features the instructor sitting on her left hip and using her left arm to support while herself while the sole of her right foot is on the mat, right knee is bent, and her right elbow rests on her right knee. She is dressed in pink/flowered exercise clothes and is on a pink yoga mat.
Loving Kindness Meditation 5 Minutes with Sharon Salzberg from the FitMind YouTube channel. Still image shows Salzberg (who has shoulder length blond hair and dark-framed glasses and is wearing a purple bottom up shirt) speaking into a microphone. On the left side of the image is text reading ‘Loving Kindness Meditation.’
About Making Space 2022
About Making Space 2022
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating. Last year, it was my turn and after an introductory Go Team post called Give Yourself Some Space, I created a series of reminders called ‘Making Space‘ that offered a suggested short exercise video and a suggested meditation in case you needed an easy way to find space for yourself in your schedule.
For 2022, I’ll be doing the same thing but I’ll also be including a link to Martha’s post from the same date in 2020 and I’ll offer a few extra ideas for relaxation, creativity, and self-kindness here and there.
These posts are not about insisting that you do more, more, more during this busy season. Instead, I want to encourage you to remember that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need in the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day.
In the Northern Hemisphere, December 21 is the Winter Solstice – the 24 hour period with the least daylight in the year. After today, things start to get a little brighter day by day.
It’s kind of like when you know the most challenging part of something is almost over and there is some ease ahead. At this point, you have to keep putting one metaphorical foot in front of the other and you will get through.
One December 21, 2020, Martha was inviting us to Embrace the Light – not only to be hopeful about the fact that there will soon be more hours of sunlight but to look for other sources of light in your life to help lift your spirits.
That’s some really great advice from Martha. Not only can we take action to bring more literal light – candles, lamps, strings of coloured lights or whathaveyou – we can also look for things that lighten our spirits – friends, family, treasured memories, enjoyable pastimes- and make them part of our days.
So, if you can, try to create some space around those ideas today: What brings light into your life? How can you stay connected to those things, those people, those activities, throughout the year?
However you decide to embrace light today, I wish you ease and peace of mind.
I hope you can be kind to yourself as you move through your day.
May you have the space and the light that you need.
My sister Denise likes to greet the sun on the winter solstice. This is her photo from December 2021. Image description: A photo of the sun rising over a distant hill on a winter morning. In the foreground are the silhouettes of large evergreen trees and in the middle ground are streets lined with houses and other buildings. There is a light dusting of snow here and there throughout the photo.
Some people who practice yoga regularly like to greet changes in season (such as the solstice) by doing 108 sun salutations. If you are more casual with your yoga practice, 108 might be a bit much for you but perhaps you might enjoy welcoming the light’s return by doing a shorter version of the practice. I have found two videos you might like, a 10 minute practice from Yoga with Adriene and a chair yoga practice from Donna Freeman.
For our meditation today, I have three things for you to choose from. The first is a slow, breath-focused practice, and the other two are opportunities for reflection rather than guided meditations.
A 10 Minute Sun Salutation Practice video from Yoga with Adriene. The still image shows a blue panel on the left with white text reading ’30 Days of Yoga’, on the right, Adriene is doing a low lunge on a pink yoga mat that is resting on a brown wooden floor.
A video from the Donna Freeman YouTube channel entitled ‘Chair Yoga Sun Salutations: Two Ways.’ The still image shows the instructor facing to the left while sitting on a kitchen chair in a home studio space that features a large painting of a daisy hanging on the back wall. The instructor is at the edge of the chair with their legs extended in front of them (touching the floor), and their arms extended overhead and forwards. Their upper body is leaned forward slightly.
A Winter Solstice Guided Meditation 2022 from Jenna Goldman’s YouTube channel. The still image is divided horizontally with a black and white photo at the top that shows darkness between two outcroppings of light-coloured rock. The bottom image is of the sun in the distance rising over water.
In this video from the Royal Saskatchewan Museum, Joely BigEagle-Kequahtooway from the Buffalo People Arts Institute explains what the Winter Solstice means to her. The still image, shows the speaker (with a museum exhibit behind her) speaking animatedly with her hands, palm upwards, in front of her. She has long brown hair with some grey in it and she has glasses. She is wearing a red shirt, a pink scarf, and a necklace and earrings made with traditional materials.
This video from the Canadian Mental Health Association is entitled ‘Holiday Story Time: Mouse Celebrates The Winter Solstice’ and the still image features the story title in the foreground and a background of evergreen branches, twinkle lights, and a small red star.
About Making Space 2022
About Making Space 2022
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating. Last year, it was my turn and after an introductory Go Team post called Give Yourself Some Space, I created a series of reminders called ‘Making Space‘ that offered a suggested short exercise video and a suggested meditation in case you needed an easy way to find space for yourself in your schedule.
For 2022, I’ll be doing the same thing but I’ll also be including a link to Martha’s post from the same date in 2020 and I’ll offer a few extra ideas for relaxation, creativity, and self-kindness here and there.
These posts are not about insisting that you do more, more, more during this busy season. Instead, I want to encourage you to remember that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need in the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day.
When we have a lot on our metaphorical plates like many of us do right now, we tend to put our heads down and just try to plow through our lists.
These Making Space posts are intended to encourage you to look up every now and then and try to find ways to take care of yourself – the person managing that unwieldy list.
I’m this post, I’m hoping to encourage you to not only make space for today’s you but to make a little extra room for a future you, as well.
Don’t worry, I’m not going to go all science fiction-y on you here, I’m just wondering if there is anything your current self has time to do that will help future you have some extra time or a little more brainspace?
As in, what is something you will need tomorrow, Friday, next week, on January 2nd, or whenever that you can start to put in place right now?
I don’t necessarily mean going out to buy things in advance – although that can be handy. I’m thinking of things like making up a guest bed now instead of right before the guests arrive. Or baking and freezing a cake today so you don’t have to bake it right before the party. Or setting a reminder to pick up ice on the way to your Aunt’s place so you don’t have to keep trying to remember it. Or, like scheduling some downtime the morning after a hectic event. Or putting the files you’ll need on your first day back in your top drawer. Or making notes on that report so you can have a head start when you return to it.
That isn’t an exhaustive list, of course, only you know how to best make space for your future self.
And, no matter what you choose, or how small a space you manage to create, I’m sure that future you will be grateful for the breathing room. 💚
Gentle reminder: I know I have suggested this before but remember that you can also create space for your future self by deciding to drop some of those ‘if I have time’ items from your list in advance.
Martha’s 2020 post for today was Get close to water and that’s great advice if you need a little peace of mind or a way to refresh. Taking a shower or bath can help you create a little mental space and getting near water can do the same thing.
If a shower/bath/visit to the water isn’t possible for the rest of your day, maybe these videos can offer a similar feeling of refreshment.
The first is ‘water element’ yoga at the beach and the second is 5 minutes of a waterfall video for meditation.
If the sound of running water makes you need to pee, visit the bathroom before that second video. 😉
Whether your water-based mental space comes from a shower, a video, or a frosty glass, I wish you ease today and always.
Please be kind to yourself. ⭐️💚
A video from the Miranda of the Mountains YouTube channel entitled ‘Gentle Yoga for Healthy Joints (water element)’ The still image shows the video title on the left and a photo of the instructor on the right sitting cross-legged on a beach with her arms extended (palms up) in front of her as she faces sideways to the right with the ocean behind her and on her right.
A 5 Minute Water Meditation video from the YouTube Channel ‘Seek Within You.’ The still image shows a rushing waterfall in the background with text reading ‘5-minute Water Meditation’ in the foreground on the left side.
About Making Space 2022
About Making Space 2022
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating. Last year, it was my turn and after an introductory Go Team post called Give Yourself Some Space, I created a series of reminders called ‘Making Space‘ that offered a suggested short exercise video and a suggested meditation in case you needed an easy way to find space for yourself in your schedule.
For 2022, I’ll be doing the same thing but I’ll also be including a link to Martha’s post from the same date in 2020 and I’ll offer a few extra ideas for relaxation, creativity, and self-kindness here and there.
These posts are not about insisting that you do more, more, more during this busy season. Instead, I want to encourage you to remember that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need in the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day.
In the spirit of putting the most important things as early as possible in your day, let me start by saying that today is my Mom’s birthday – Happy Birthday, Mom! I hope your day has the perfect amount of space in it.
As for everyone who *isn’t* my Mom, maybe you’d like to offer yourself a little space in honour of my Mom’s birthday. Think along these lines, “I’m awfully busy but it IS Carol-Ann’s birthday and traditionally one celebrates that by taking good care of oneself – just as she would advise us to.”
Is this actually a tradition? Well, I celebrated my Mom’s birthday on the blog last year so this is two years in a row – that seems like a tradition to me.
Listen, I know and you know that we don’t actually need anyone’s permission to make the space that we need BUT a lot of the time we find ourselves waiting for that permission – from ourselves, from someone else, or from the universe as a whole. If you have that kind of feeling today, consider this official permission to make that space.
On December 16, 2020, Martha was inviting us to Unplug – to take some time away from all of the devices that both bless and curse us. I fully endorse unplugging at whatever level works for you – after all, your phone is a device for YOUR convenience, not a device to put you at other people’s beck and call.
And, I invite you to metaphorically unplug from the need to wait for your rest, from the unconscious need to get permission to make space for yourself and I hope you can untie the knots that keep the word ‘should’ tied so closely to your decision making process.
Today, as you celebrate my Mom’s birthday by making a little space for yourself, I hope you find ease and I hope you find fun.
Whether you try the videos below or make space on your own terms, I hope you are kind to yourself in the process.
A 10 Minute Upper Body Yoga Stretch – Beginner Yoga for Neck, Shoulders, and Back from the Yoga with Kassandra YouTube channel. The still image shows the title of the video on the upper left and the instructor on the right, kneeling on their mat in blue yoga clothing, stretching their face and neck to their right with their hands clasped behind them and to their right. In the background is a wall made from large sections of log like you see in rustic cabins.
A 10 Minute Meditation for Creating Space from the YoginiMelbourne YouTube Channel. The still image is of a person sitting cross-legged, meditating in the woods with sun lighting the greenery behind them. The title of the video is in white text on the left of the image and the name of the channel is in the bottom right.
About Making Space 2022
About Making Space 2022
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating. Last year, it was my turn and after an introductory Go Team post called Give Yourself Some Space, I created a series of reminders called ‘Making Space‘ that offered a suggested short exercise video and a suggested meditation in case you needed an easy way to find space for yourself in your schedule.
For 2022, I’ll be doing the same thing but I’ll also be including a link to Martha’s post from the same date in 2020 and I’ll offer a few extra ideas for relaxation, creativity, and self-kindness here and there.
These posts are not about insisting that you do more, more, more during this busy season. Instead, I want to encourage you to remember that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need in the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day.
So, we are 11 days into December…how are you doing with all of the things?
This is probably a good time to take an extra few minutes to yourself and figure out if things are unfolding as you had hoped.
Is there anything you meant to do so far that really needs to get done soon?
Is there anything on your list that you can decide not to do?
Do you want to change your priorities for the next few weeks?
Have you managed to find some space for yourself one way or another over the past 11 days? Maybe not every day but hopefully most days?
Remember, this is about YOU finding space in a way that works for YOU.
You don’t have to do the videos I share. You don’t have to meditate.
I just want you to find a way to be kind to yourself this month (and always!)
I have more to say on reassessing below but for those of you who might want to jump right to the videos, here they are:
A video from Dianne Bondy’s Yoga channel entitled 10-Minute Mindful Movement Snack. The title of the video is in white text against a blue background on the left side of the still image. The right side of the image is Dianne Bondy in a blue tank top and blue leggings, sitting cross-legged on a yoga mat with her left arm stretched overhead and slightly to the right as she leans her upper body to the right side supported by her right hand on the mat.
A video from RosalieYoga channel entitled 7 Minute Yoga Nidra Energy Boost. The title of the video is on the right side of the still image and on the left side a woman in purple leggings and purple tank top is sitting back on her heels with her arms raised slightly so she can place her hands together in front of her face with the tips of her thumbs touching the space between her eyebrows.
The Chatty Part
I jumped to a conclusion.
I’ve been accessing Martha’s 2020 posts from her summary post of the whole Wellness Calendar series and I have to admit, I bristled at the name of today’s post as it was presented in the summary. Delay gratification? I don’t want to advise people who are trying to find space for themselves in their days to WAIT for anything – I want to encourage them to carve out time for self-care as soon as possible.
I mean, obviously delaying gratification can be a useful skill in many contexts but I don’t want to talk about it in this one.
However, my initial bristling quickly became a lesson in actually *reading* things and not jumping to conclusions.
Martha’s post is NOT about delaying your own gratification.
I really should have known better. Even if Martha had been writing about that, it would have been relevant and helpful and I could have built on what she had said, even if I took it in a different direction.
However, Martha wrote exactly the kind of post that I would have wanted her to.
Her post is about delaying other people’s gratification. It’s about not being ‘on call’ for other people’s schedules or whims. It’s about setting your own priorities and responding to other people’s priorities at a time that makes sense in your schedule.
I can definitely get behind that.
So, go read Martha’s post and then jump back here for my additions.
Welcome back!
So, I hope Martha has convinced you to set your own priorities and to take charge of your time (even if you can only take charge of 5 minutes segments right now.)
But, if you are like me, you might have trouble setting priorities – especially this time of year when everything feels like it either must be done RIGHT NOW or that it can’t be done yet but it will be required in a busy flurry of activity later.
To help myself prioritize, I’ve made a list of questions to ask myself about my to do list at any given time and I thought they might be helpful for you, too.
Sometimes, I put these questions in a chart with my to list along the left side and the questions across the top so I have a visual indication of my priorities. Other times, I write each task on index cards and sort them or I just put a symbol next to them in my original list. Basically, I find a way to add the information to the tasks in a way that lets me compare the information.
So, here are the questions:
Does this task have a deadline?
Is this task taking up a lot of brainspace?
Is this task part of a sequence of tasks? (e.g. – I have to buy eggs before I can make cookies)
Does this task need to be done soon or could it wait? (this is different than a deadline. I have tasks on my list that I would like to get done sooner rather than later but realistically, they can wait if need be.)
Is this something *I* am choosing to do/have to do or is it someone else’s request?
Is this task fun?
Can I get this done in just a few minutes and get it out of the way?
Once I have added this contextual information to the list, I have a better sense of what to do next.
If I have tasks with urgent deadlines, I can choose times to work on them as soon as possible. If something is taking up a lot of mental space, I can try to get that done right away so my brain feels better. If a task is part of a sequence, I can pick which one to start with. If a task can wait, I can make it a low priority. If it is a request from someone else (but not part of my assigned tasks at work) I can decide where it goes in my priorities and let them know when (or if) I will get to it. If the task is fun, I can choose to work on it during breaks from other tasks, I can choose to do it during non-work hours, or I can make it a priority on days that I have trouble getting started. And, if I determine that an important task can be done in just a few minutes (I use a timer!) I will pick the soonest possible time and plan to do that task then so I can get it out of the way.
And, of course, having all of this information presented together lets me prioritize any tasks that are in multiple categories – so, for example, a fun task that takes up a lot of brainspace and has a deadline will get done before someone else’s task that is third in a sequence of tasks.
Now, I’m not saying that I can do this once for my list and be done with it. Other people’s priorities creep up on me all of the time (and sometimes it is not worth the internal emotional cost of turning them down.) And, since challenges with prioritizing is one of the ways that my ADHD shows up, I can’t always stick with my plans.
However, I do find this useful and I hope you do, too.
You may need to use different questions or a different system for choosing but taking the time to think about how your tasks match your priorities (or your values or your expectations) can help you to feel more in charge of your list overall.
I wish you ease today and always.
Please be kind to yourself about this and about anything else you have going on today. 💚⭐
About Making Space 2022
About Making Space 2022
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating. Last year, it was my turn and after an introductory Go Team post called Give Yourself Some Space, I created a series of reminders called ‘Making Space‘ that offered a suggested short exercise video and a suggested meditation in case you needed an easy way to find space for yourself in your schedule.
For 2022, I’ll be doing the same thing but I’ll also be including a link to Martha’s post from the same date in 2020 and I’ll offer a few extra ideas for relaxation, creativity, and self-kindness here and there.
These posts are not about insisting that you do more, more, more during this busy season. Instead, I want to encourage you to remember that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need in the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day.
Since I have been getting a bit wordy in my posts, I’ve decided that I am going to put the videos at the beginning of each one and the chatty bit at the end.
That way, if you just want a video to try, you can have at it right away. If you want to read on, the advice part is at the end.
Here are your videos for today – Because emotions tend to run high at this time of year, I chose three videos about dealing with and processing your feelings. Even if you aren’t feeling angry or frustrated at the moment, the movement or the meditation will still be good for you.
Whether you try these or something else, I wish you ease as you make your way through your day and into the weekend.
Please be kind to yourself.
💚⭐
A video from Yoga with Bird entitled ’10 Minute Yoga Flow To Let Go Of Anger and Stress. The still image is of the instructor lying on her back on her yoga mat with her knees pulled up to her chest with her arms wrapped around her shins to pull them closer towards her. She is wearing patterned leggings and a blue bandeau top. There are yoga blocks and a plant in the background on a white fuzzy rug.
This video is a bit longer than the ones I usually post but you can just do part of it if you are short on time. The instructor has a slightly irreverent approach and the video includes songs with NSFW language, judge yourself accordingly. This video is from EMKFIT and is called ‘Angry Boxing HIIT Workout – if you’re in a bad mood.’ The still image is of a person in black shorts, a sports bra, and sneakers, doing a side kick while shouting and punching. The words Anger Management and 20 min HIIT Boxing Workout are on the left side of the image.
This video from the Blissful Meditations YouTube channel is called ‘Guided meditation for experiencing emotions and anger’ and the still image shows a long-haired person in a bodysuit suit sitting cross-legged on a broad expanse of sand with some trees in the distance.
Now for the chatty part:
Martha’s December 9, 2020 post was called Stomp, stomp, stomp and it was all about releasing pent-up emotions so you could get on with your day. As always, she had some great tips in there so go check that out when you get a chance.
Reading Martha’s post reminded me of a quote from an episode of Stargate Atlantis that I used to have taped to my wall.
I can’t find the exact phrasing right now but it was from an episode where the two main ‘warrior’ characters, Teyla and Ronon were having a conversation about a difficult situation they were in. Teyla was justifiably furious but her anger was getting in the way of the things she was trying to accomplish. Ronan (in a competely non-dismissive way!) said something like
‘If your anger fuels you, use it. If your anger distracts you, you must put it aside.’
I don’t remember whether she decided to use her anger as fuel or whether she put it aside for the moment and tried something else but I just loved the distinction there. She wasn’t being told not to be angry. She wasn’t being told that her anger was wrong. Her anger was acknowledged and then she had a choice about how to forge ahead.
This time of year, when we are all a little extra stressed, our emotions tend to be pretty close to the surface. It can be easier to find things to be happy or excited about but we can also find ourselves feeling a lot of anger, frustration, and resentment.
I’d like to remind you that it is ok to be feeling that way.
You’ll want to be careful about how you express those feelings, of course, but the feelings themselves are ok to have. Yes, even the so-called ‘negative’ feelings of anger, frustration, and resentment.
Those feelings are telling us something important about a situation that needs to be changed.
I’m not a psychologist or a therapist and this isn’t exactly the place to get into a deep discussion of relationship dynamics or effective communication. If those things are major issues for you and you need emotional support on those topics, I hope you can find a mental health professional who can help you.
If you just find those things to be challenging from time to time, here are a couple of articles with guidelines forcommunicating emotions that may help and I’ll add this little bit from my storytelling and coaching practices:
Please be careful about the story you create in your head about *why* the other person has done the things that they do.
While it may be true that the person is not be doing their share because they are, indeed, a lazy jerk – after all, some people are – their apparently laziness might be something else entirely.
It’s possible that they don’t understand what needs to be done, that they haven’t learned the same cues that you have about when things need to get done, or that they thought you enjoyed doing all of the things and didn’t realize it was causing you stress. If you try to communicate from the assumption that they are a lazy jerk and you are the saver-of-every-day, it’s going to make it hard to change the situation.
I’m not suggesting that you ‘fix’ your anger for other people’s comfort. Nor am I suggesting that you let people away with terrible behaviour. What I am suggesting is that if you want the situation to change, you might want to get the information your anger is guiding you to discover and make space for yourself to have a different experience in the future.
So, to go back to Ronon’s advice – if your anger is fueling you to make a change in an unfair situation, then use it to make things better. Use it to see what is actually going on and to create a better approach for now or for next time.
But, if you are incandescent with rage and it is filling your brain, keeping you stuck, preventing you from making needed changes, or just keeping you in a mental loop of documenting the offenses against you, taking good care of yourself might include releasing some of that emotional overwhelm by stomping around (as Martha suggests) and/or by trying the videos above.
Once you can think clearly again, once you have made some mental space, you can choose to use your anger as fuel to make the changes you need to make for your own wellbeing.
Trying not to be angry is not useful and it definitely won’t help. Feeling your feelings, being kind to yourself about your anger and deciding whether to use it as fuel or to put it aside for the moment will be more helpful to you in the long run.
No matter what you are feeling today, I wish you ease and I hope you can make space for your own needs on your to do list.
About Making Space 2022
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating. Last year, it was my turn and after an introductory Go Team post called Give Yourself Some Space, I created a series of reminders called ‘Making Space‘ that offered a suggested short exercise video and a suggested meditation in case you needed an easy way to find space for yourself in your schedule.
For 2022, I’ll be doing the same thing but I’ll also be including a link to Martha’s post from the same date in 2020 and I’ll offer a few extra ideas for relaxation, creativity, and self-kindness here and there.
These posts are not about insisting that you do more, more, more during this busy season. Instead, I want to encourage you to remember that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need in the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day.
No matter what you have ahead of you this month, things probably feel like they are about to ramp up but they haven’t quite gotten hectic yet. That makes this an excellent time to put a few things in place for future you.
In 2020, Martha was reminding us that staying hydrated makes a huge difference in how we feel. And when we’re busy, we want to make sure to do anything we can think of that will tip the balance towards us feeling a bit better.
So, with that in mind, what else might keep us feeling a bit better?
What other small things can you do for your future self? You know, the one who might be a bit more frazzled that you are now.
Are there tasks that tend to build up over the month that you can do a little bit at time starting now??
Is there something that you often run out when things get busy but that you could pick up now? Like scotch tape, sugar, or soap – to name just a few things I have had to dash out and get at inconvenient times.
Can you block off some downtime later in the month? This could come in handy when you are invited to something that you don’t really have the capacity for, you can tell them that you are already booked that night!
Speaking of small things you can do for your future self, here are two videos of neck stretches that can really reduce the tension you carry in that area. Reducing that tightness could be just the right way to prevent a future headache.
Whatever you choose to do today, I wish you ease. I hope you can find your own way to keep stress at a minimum and be kind to yourself in the process..
A Yoga with Adriene ‘silent’ video called Yoga for Daily Neck Relief. This video has only music and no verbal cues. The still image is a black and white photo of Adriene with her hair pulled back in a lace band and low ponytail. She is looking to her right.
I enjoy the video above but since Adriene isn’t giving verbal cues, it might not be useful for everyone. Sooo, I have included the video below (another favourite of mine), that includes clear verbal cues.
A video from Mark Wildman called ‘A 3 Minute Neck Drill That Will Change Your Life’ – I’m not sure if it is life changing but it sure is helpful! The still image is two photos of Wildman sitting on a set of steps in a gym. In the first he is extending his neck forward so his face is closest to the camera. In the second he is pulling his chin backwards to extend the muscles in the back of his neck. He has his hands laid over one another on his chest.
Sidenote: As I mention in this 2018 post called Cause and Effect, Effect and Cause I have realized that while anxiety and stress can cause me to have a tight neck, the opposite is also true. If my neck is tight for some physical reason, my brain goes into overdrive because it assumes I am anxious. And, of course, with enough poking around, my brain will always find something to be anxious about. That anxiety makes my neck tighter…you get the picture. If that happens to you, too, these videos might be extra useful.
Not up to neck stretches today? Maybe this grounding meditation is more your speed.
A video called ‘Managing Anxious Thoughts And Stress with Mindfulness’ from the Headspace YouTube Channel. The still image has an orange background and a smiling yellow blob with its eyes closed is on the right hand side. On the left is text reading ‘Lost in Thought? Try Grounding.’
About Making Space 2022
About Making Space 2022
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating. Last year, it was my turn and after an introductory Go Team post called Give Yourself Some Space, I created a series of reminders called ‘Making Space‘ that offered a suggested short exercise video and a suggested meditation in case you needed an easy way to find space for yourself in your schedule.
For 2022, I’ll be doing the same thing but I’ll also be including a link to Martha’s post from the same date in 2020 and I’ll offer a few extra ideas for relaxation, creativity, and self-kindness here and there.
These posts are not about insisting that you do more, more, more during this busy season. Instead, I want to encourage you to remember that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need in the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day.
In December 2020, Fit is a Feminist Issue blogger Martha created a tradition – a series of reminder posts to take good care of ourselves during this last month of the year when it is far too easy to get swept up in your to do list, no matter what you are celebrating or not celebrating. Last year, it was my turn and after an introductory Go Team post called Give Yourself Some Space, I created a series of reminders called ‘Making Space‘ that offered a suggested short exercise video and a suggested meditation in case you needed an easy way to find space for yourself in your schedule.
For 2022, I’ll be doing the same thing but I’ll also be including a link to Martha’s post from the same date in 2020 and I’ll offer a few extra ideas for relaxation, creativity, and self-kindness here and there.
These posts are not about insisting that you do more, more, more during this busy season. Instead, I want to encourage you to remember that there IS a *YOU* who is doing all of the things and you are worth taking good care of.
Perhaps the things I suggest aren’t what you need in the moment. That’s totally ok. Perhaps you can use something else to create some space, something that will help you feel more relaxed or more in charge of your day.
On December 1, 2020, Martha reminded us that we are always enough (a position that I whole-heartedly endorse) and that things don’t need to be perfect to be good. Please go check out that post for an excellent reminder of how it is ok (and encouraged!) for you to show up just as you are.
On that theme, I’m wondering if you know about Jennifer Louden’s Conditions of Enoughness? I find them an excellent tool for keeping my self-expectations in line with my actual capacity but, like most useful things, they take a bit of practice. If you feel like you are always scrambling or if you have a nagging feeling that you are falling short, the advice at the link above could be just the thing you need to give yourself a break.
If movement is something you need right now, perhaps this short series of stretches will help.
Ok, so most of us are already up for the day but feel free to lie down again for a few minutes and do these stretches with Joelle. Description: A video called Morning Stretch in Bed from the Yoga with Joelle YouTube channel. The still image shows a person with long dark hair lying on their back at the foot of a double bed using their clasped hands to draw their right knee towards their body while their left leg is extended.
If meditation is more your speed, give this a try.
A short meditation from the Great Meditations YouTube channel. The still image shows a cartoon drawing of person with long brown hair with a peaceful expression sitting cross-legged on a fluffy cloud against a blue background.
Whatever you try or whatever you do, I hope you can be kind to yourself in the process.
PS – If you are already feeling overwhelmed by the thought of the month ahead, you might find this old article of mine helpful. December is like a messy closet, here’s how to get it back on track. I’m not actually too concerned with you be ‘on track’ but I do want you to have peace of mind and I hope the suggestions in that piece can help you move in that direction.
I don’t know if the recent tension in my upper back is from inadequate stretching after my TKD classes, from lifting heavy things as I declutter my basement, or from not paying enough attention to my posture but I do know that I am not enjoying it.
I have done some extra stretching. I have spent a fair bit of time lying on a lacrosse ball. I have draped myself over my foam roller.
Nothing has really helped so far.
Apparently, I needed a slice of pizza to do this correctly. I’ll keep that in mind for next time. Image description: a GIF of a person lying on their back on a bumpy orange foam roller. They are holding a piece of pizza to their mouth and the point of the slice is between their teeth. They are leaning back over the roller so their head gets closer to the floor and then they are lifting their head and shoulders further away from the floor, holding the pizza in their mouth the whole time. White letters in the bottom right show a url – rollga.com and at the top of the image is a hashtag in white letters reading #pizzaroll
Then, this morning, I received a newsletter from Yoga with Joelle announcing her latest video – Yoga for Rhomboid and Upper Back and I realized two things:
1) I’ve stretched but I haven’t done any yoga specifically for my upper back.
2) I had forgotten that those muscles were called the rhomboids.
(Rhomboid is a very fun word, go on and say it a few times in a row.)
My storytelling self knows that knowing something’s true name gives you power over it.
I’m going to do this video a few days in a row and see if name magic holds true for muscles. 😉
A YouTube video from Yoga with Joelle. In the still image she is wearing a grey tank top and burgundy leggings and is doing a seated twisting pose with her right hand behind her, her right leg folded over her extended left leg, and her left elbow resting against her upraised right knee.
PS – After writing this, I remembered that I was working on a similar issue last year. I started out with a plan to give my shoulders some attention and then realized that part of the problem was my chair and my monitor. I guess I need to make upper back attention part of my regular routine.
Over the past few years, in an attempt to counter the natural ‘but what if…’ tendencies of my ADHD brain I have been reminding myself to ‘do the easy thing’ whenever I can.
This isn’t the same as ‘taking the easy way out.’
Instead, it’s about 1) figuring out the easiest/most straightforward way to get something done 2) making sure that approach will cover the key details/meet the needs of the people involved 3) only adding more complexity if needed.
So, instead of letting my brain branch out into every possibility, I try to find what feels easiest and check if that will work before letting things get more complicated.
Yes, some things are inherently complex, difficult, or challenging but not everything has to be difficult and complexity for complexity’s sake doesn’t really help anyone.
Can I remember to do the easy thing every time?
No. I cannot.
Do I *try* to remember to do the easy thing whenever possible?
Oh hells, yes.
How does ‘do the easy thing’ play out in real life?
Like this:
At the beginning of last week, I noticed that I was really worn out
Not sleepy. Not tired.
Worn out.
My brain immediately started with an elaborate and overwhelming plan to address the problem but I somehow managed to put the brakes on and ask myself…
What’s the easy thing?
The answer was not more sleep, it wasn’t time off, it wasn’t big discussions about my workload. The answer, the easy thing, was to do short sessions of yoga and meditation before bed.
It felt so straightforward, so easy and so good, that I was drawn to do the same thing the next night. And the night after. And the night after that…
Now, at day 9, the easy thing has made a wonderful difference in how I feel, no complex plan required.
Khalee is uncertain about yoga blocks so she had to do a sniff test. This photo makes her look like she has flipped a block with her nose but actually the cork block is propped up on the other one. Image description: An evening shot of a yoga mat and blocks on a patio with flowerpots and string lights. There’s a shawl thrown onto the mat and Khalee, my dog, is sniffing the blocks.A post meditation shot. I found meditation relaxing but I think Khalee was on guard the whole time. image description: a sort of selfie of me and Khalee. My face and part of my right upper body can be seen on one side of the image but the majority of the shot is of Khalee sitting low on the patio, staring past the camera to some dog-determined minor threat. My patio sliding door and part of the inside of my house can be seen behind us. The lights on my patio rail are reflected in the glass door.
