Mostly, I love my fancy new gym.

But there is one way in which it chafes. It definitely rubs me the wrong way in terms of gender.

To be clear, it is a very gendered space.

I’ve written a bit about this before. See Gender is weird, or Sam’s first reflections on her fancy new gym

“I’ve been feeling more and more that I don’t belong in women only spaces. It’s not that I don’t identify as a woman. I do. But lots of the people I want to spend time with don’t. I don’t want to be in spaces that exclude them. Lots of my friends identify as gender queer or gender fluid or gender non binary and it feels different excluding them than it does excluding cis men.

I’m still thinking lots about this and I’m not sure what this means for me and my future in women only environments. I used to think it was okay as long as they were trans inclusive but that’s no longer enough for me, I think. And it’s not that I don’t think there should be such spaces but I am wondering more and more about my place in them.”

Lately where it’s been bugging me is in the regular weight room. There are an awful lot of men there and not very many women. But it’s not that there aren’t any women in the building.

The women-only part of the gym, accessed through the women’s change room, is hopping. But it doesn’t have the same range of equipment and it’s not as nice. I’ve never worked out there.

I know why they have it. There are women who for cultural and religious reasons don’t work out in front of men. And I’m glad there is a space for them.

The women’s workout area also has video access to the kid’s supervised play area. (But what about dads who want to watch their kids play while they work out?)

However, the existence of the women’s workout area means there are fewer women in the regular weight room. That space, which is enormous and very well-equipped, starts to feel like the men’s workout area, which it most definitely is not.

There’s a tension between inclusivity for women who need a women-only workout space and inclusivity in the gender-neutral space for those women who don’t want to work out only with other women. It’s a fine balance between creating safe spaces and unintentionally reinforcing the gender divide.

So many of my students now identity as gender non-binary that I wonder if this problem will just go away with time. I hope so.

(Again, thanks to MS’s co-pilot for help with the title!)

Now, to be clear, swimming in cold water will not be the focus of every blog I write. But I wanted to write a follow-up from my first polar bear dip, in which I ended with:

“But what a great time! In fact, our group wants to go to the beach once a month, so we’re doing it again in February! I’ve put my order in for neoprene swim boots. Stay tuned for the next cold swim adventure!”

And so our group DID go again, on February 11, as we had planned. We went to Port Bruce and not Port Stanley, since there is no long sand bar at Port Bruce and one could potentially swim for a bit, or at least get immersed a shorter distance from shore. That long sand bar just killed everyone’s feet! So a bunch of us ordered neoprene booties to protect our tender tootsies. 

This time, the air temperature was -1C and felt cooler since there was a breeze coming off the lake. The water temperature was 1.4C, so much cooler than the 4C at Port Stanley.

We first acclimated to the air temperature by hanging out on the beach for about 15 min. I just had my swimsuit and a pair of shorts on. Yes, it was initially cold, but my skin started to cool and get a bit numb after a few minutes, so I no longer felt the cold. I did have my hoodie on and only took it off a few minutes before we went into the water. I wore neoprene gloves to protect my hands and the booties for my feet, which were actually WARM as I sat on the beach! And a toque for my head, as always.

We all went into the water slowly since we didn’t know when it would drop off. The dip didn’t last long, though! One member of our group decided to SPLASH into the water, which got a few of the others screaming and running back out! I quietly immersed myself up to my neck and stayed that way for 10 seconds (roughly, I’m not sure if I counted at a proper pace). At that point, the other person started to leave. I thought I could stay in for longer but didn’t want to be in the water by myself, so I also got out.

While in the water, I felt the rest of my body getting numb pretty quickly. I felt like just a head and no body! Those booties were a godsend, as I could still feel my feet and they did NOT hurt! The gloves did a great job of protecting my hands. Best purchases I’ve ever made, and highly recommended if anyone else wants to do some polar dips! 

Getting out of the water, my skin was numb and I could not feel the wind. I wrapped myself in my towels and noticed my skin was red, especially my inner arms and thighs. That cold-induced vasodilation was very noticeable there where my skin is a paler shade of brown. I got my gloves off, but needed help getting the booties off! They were snug! 

And of COURSE, as we stripped on the beach to get out of our wet swimsuits, that was the time that another group of people decided to go for a walk on the beach! Oh well….we needed to get into our dry clothes. And I noticed that when I put on my t-shirt and sweater, it felt like a thousand pinpricks were dancing on the skin on my upper back and chest. It was VERY intense. Some people might find this sensation invigorating, but for me, it was like my nerves and blood vessels were screaming at me, “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO US?!!” It also felt as if I was about to get a hot flash or fever. So it wasn’t very pleasurable…not like getting out of the cold shower. But my hands and feet and legs were fine….the pinprick sensation on my legs didn’t bother me nearly as much. I suspect this sensation is what many people enjoy about cold water immersion. I’ll need to ask my friend who got me started on this cold water journey. 

And so YES, we will be doing this AGAIN! I think the best part of the experience is the camaraderie of the group. We are all members of our Masters swim team so we know each other. For me, they are new friends, teammates I am just getting to know, and it’s nice to do this activity with them. It’s sort of a bonding exercise. The couple in the group had all of us over to their hot tub afterwards, and that was great as we drank wine and chatted. 

The best part of this cold water immersion experiment has been the friends I’ve made along the way. It started with one person (not a swimmer) I’m getting to know as a friend, and has spilled over to my new swimming teammates. It’s been a fun journey so far!

A selfie of a woman wearing glasses in a black swimsuit and grey toque on a beach

Content warning: this post discusses dietary restrictions tied to medically testing. Please be gentle with yourself and skip this read if it doesn’t feel like a good fit for you.

A friend recently mentioned she has been instructed by her doctor to eat a restricted diet for about a month. The protocol is on the types/variety of foods, not on the quantity. Although this is a medical recommendation it reminded me of a very popular 30-day diet focusing on eliminating certain types of foods and then gradually adding them back in after the allotted period. I tried that diet many years ago (due to popularity, not medical need) and only lasted about half the time. It brought up a lot of feelings around disordered eating for me and I stopped when I realized the harm that was happening. In my house that diet is jokingly known as the Hole-15.

Shortly after discussing this 30-day restriction with my friend I learned that I will need to be on a restricted diet prior to a medical procedure in a couple weeks. The restriction will only last about a week, but will get gradually more restrictive approaching procedure day. Interestingly, the restrictions will allow for a lot of foods that I consider “comfort food.” Even knowing that I immediately began having anxiety about any type of food restriction and the alarm bells that triggers in my brain. After a lifetime of disordered eating, weight cycling, and fighting with my body I always proceed with great caution when “rules” around diet and exercise pop up (see also: any post I’ve written about failing to reach a minimum set of workouts, time outside, etc and so forth).

I have a lot of resources and tools in place to manage this period of restriction. And I’m incredibly relieved that it is “only” 7 days and not longer. But I can’t help notice that neither the nurse at my general practitioner’s office or the scheduler at the specialist’s office felt it was important to mention the restricted diet and ask if any additional support would be needed around that protocol. The nurse just said the specialist’s office would call to schedule the procedure. And the scheduler said she would “send the instructions over” for me to review. I do have an appointment to speak with someone else about a week before the procedure to get more information and ask any questions. But that comes 2 weeks after having received the information for this restricted diet… for me that equals 2 weeks of anxiety and worry.

A few years ago I made a commitment to myself that I would seek regular medical care despite the weight bias and shoddy treatment of many patients in larger bodies. I also vowed that I would speak up when I noticed something like this, talking to the provider(s) about how a small change in their protocol may be beneficial to patients.

Have you noticed any medical protocols that you could bring awareness to for yourself or others? Please share in the comments.

Amy Smith is a professor of Media & Communication and a communication consultant who lives north of Boston. Her research interests include gender communication and community building. Amy spends her movement time riding the basement bicycle to nowhere, walking her two dogs, and waiting for it to get warm enough for outdoor swimming in New England.