fitness · holidays

Silly fitness gifts, the 2025 edition

Weeee’re back! Here are some of the newest (at least to me) silly so-called fitness gifts that you don’t need– either to give or receive– in 2025. All of them made some media outlet’s top fitness gift list this year, so beware.

By the way, here are some of my previous posts about silly fitness gifts, from 2019 and 2023.

Now, to this year’s picks:

A Smart-rope— that is, a jump rope with a smart-phone-app connection.

Overly fancy jump rope with slippery handles, nausea-inducing special effects and obligatory app.
Overly fancy jump rope with slippery handles, nausea-inducing special effects and obligatory app. But you do get a choice of handle colors…

So many complaints:

  • The handles are smooth plastic, which look like they will slip when you start sweating (as I do).
  • It has leaded beads that are LED lights, so you have to recharge it.
  • Why would I willingly buy something that requires me to install yet another single-purpose app? I know, okay boomer, but still. I don’t like app clutter.
  • It displays the number of jumps you’ve made through the LED thingies, so you see flashing lights going on and off in front of you the whole time you’re jumping. Hello, nausea!
  • It relentlessly keeps track of how many jumps, how fast you’re jumping, how long your jumping. And will tell everyone on the internet if you aren’t careful about your settings. No.
  • It’s $79. No. I can buy a regular jump rope for $4.97. It works just fine and doesn’t increase my risk of a seizure.

Magnetic sling bag for your water bottle

Water bottle sling bag. It does come in two colors-- you can buy both for $118.
It does come in two colors– you can buy both for $118.

Honestly, who needs this? Can’t we just put our bottles in our gym bags? Also, my water bottle has its own handle, specifically for carrying. Just sayin’.

Third, a favorite, but at an unbearable price: Peloton bike (retail!) Price $2695

Really? Does some editor think it’s May 2020? You can get a used Peloton bike for $500 on ebay, and less elsewhere. I saw this one for $350 on Facebook Marketplace.

Used peloton bike. $350. Membership extra.
Used peloton bike. $350. Membership extra.

When did Beauty advent calendars become a thing? And a very expensive thing at that! Here’s one a list-maker recommended: the Alo Yoga Advent Calendar.

A bunch of boxes containing "Magnesium Reset Spray, gel shots, supplements, accessories, and so much more". For $280. No thank you.
A bunch of boxes containing “Magnesium Reset Spray, gel shots, supplements, accessories, and so much more”. For $280. No thank you.

Also, it’s for the workout novice? Is it an advanced workout to open all those boxes? Again, just no. By the way, this is among the less expensive of the beauty advent calendars. I’m completely bumfuzzled about this phenomenon. Do you know any more about this? Please let me know in the comments.

Honestly, if you’re looking to give gifts or give hints to your loved ones about gifts you’d like, there are so many other choices, including donations to organizations that are doing good and needed work. Also, books are nice.

Hey readers– have you received any silly or wildly unnecessary fitness-y gifts for the holidays? I’d love to hear about them.

Happy holiday season, folks!

Let us know what you think....