My new physiotherapist tells me that I’m tough. She also says I’m determined.
That’s the kind of praise I need these days.
Because contrary to our usual message, I’m not exercising these days because it’s fun or joyful or at all social. I’m doing a lot of boring, repetitive, sometimes painful exercises, mostly by myself, in order to regain basic knee function so I can do things like climb stairs and get out of chairs without grimacing. I’m also making time for it when I am super busy and when the exercising part doesn’t feel like a reward at the end of a long day. It’s more like punishment.
So when Tracy wrote yesterday that “our number one piece of advice for anyone is to find activities that you enjoy” I admit that I kind of flinched. Because my life isn’t like that right now. Right now I am doing a lot of physio. My knee hurts. I’m resolute and determined to get back on my bike even though I’ll never run or play soccer again. Aikido? Maybe. I’ve got hope for cycling. We’ll see. I’m in mourning a bit for my former self!
In my Facebook memories newsfeed a happy photo came through of the Run for Retina 9 years ago. It’s me and cousin Tara doing the 5 km. Look at our smiles! Look how happy we are!
I’m not sure why I am telling you all this, except to find company and to reassure those of you, who like me, who are in pain, that you are also not alone.
I do exercises to support my knee function to my pain tolerance and then it’s all ice and ibuprofen after. I’ve missing the Fowler Kennedy game ready ice and compression thingie. I want one for home!
Yesterday, I was balancing and marching and doing squats on a bosu ball. See here for how that helps.
So contrary to our usual message of “if you don’t love it, don’t do it,” this is me saying, it’s not always fun or joyful or social and sometimes you need grit and determination and you do it anyway. That’s part of my character, a big part of who I am.
What was Tracy’s message last week, life on life’s terms? Something like that.