How Much is Enough When it Comes to Our Health?

I’m facing probable heart surgery at some point soonish, and I’m finding it all very complicated.

If I were a “normal” heart patient, maybe this would be easier. I have excellent care at the Ottawa Heart Institute; the issue is with me.

When I was first diagnosed with a severe heart murmur, I was surprised. After all, I’m active and didn’t have symptoms, or so I thought. But then I was sent for a stress test and told what symptoms to look for.

My cardiologist was happy with my stress test results but I was not. As a friend said at the time, I need to learn to distinguish between diagnostic and competitive. Put another way, I should have been told to go as long as I was comfortable, not as long as I could.

I started learning to acknowledge that I get breathless when climbing stairs, that I may not faint but I definitely suffer from “brown-outs”. That constant chest pressure is not normal and cannot be explained by overdoing workouts (at least not for weeks on end). And that I’ll be lucky to hit 1/10 of this year’s modest cycling goal.

At the same time, I am still active and would like to stay that way. So how do I navigate that fine line between advocating for myself and not wasting scarce health resources before I need to? When does advocating turn into drama queen behaviour?

I may still be quite healthy compared to some other heart patients, but I also have a lifeguarding job that requires me to be very fit.

I have settled on being clearer about my symptoms with my doctor while reminding myself that early intervention may actually save the health care system money in the long run.

I feel a bit guilty, but also have an angiogram scheduled for mid-December, and an appointment with a surgeon after that, which indicates that maybe it was wise to be speak up.