Today we are probably living in one the most women conscious decade in Indian women’s history because of the all-time high number of cases of domestic violence against women. From domestic violence to rape we hear cases being reported every day by prominent national and international media organizations. No government, NGO or any other relevant organisation have until now delivered a viable solution to stop this widespread problem in India.
If you are a woman who has a weak heart, you may likely experience the problem and become a cold statistics. Here is my personal experience.
It was a just another night, I was walking back home with my family after a party. We were all chatting and laughing. All of sudden I realized that my grandmother was missing, my heart literally skipped a heartbeat. Although she is old by age but she looks relatively young and something might have happened in between our laughter’s noise. Next second I scanned the road and there she was walking ahead of all of us already reached the end of the road. I quickly communicated to my grandfather to hurry up and what he said changed my outlook of the so-called “women empowerment”.
And he said “Do you think anybody can even touch her; she can herself beat four men at a time”
These were simple words, but they were uncommon to define a woman. I myself fear to walk alone on a deadly deserted road even in daylight. I am younger than her, have travelled half of the country by myself, but still got nothing in comparison to her.
At that moment, I learned a new thing, may be a secret for a lifetime.
The secret was the confidence she had in herself. So I spend a few days studying her days and getting to understand the source of this confidence and there it was loud and clear. She has a lifestyle which has defined her health and lead to a fit body even in her 60s. She has been forever active, carry out most of the household task herself. She has a mindset to take up the challenges and hunt them down.
It was getting wild for me as the intrigued about the subject more because I needed a solution for myself and for every girl (especially in Delhi) who was haunted by the recent women related crime around the country. Her time was different; the world was typically safer, healthier, easier and different in terms of lifestyle as it is today. So the search began for an answer, a face which has a parallel confidence like my grandmother but can deal and work out for modern scenarios. The answer was right in front of me. My YouTube account linked me to a video of Mary Kom. There she was speaking, portraying and living as a feminist we all might need to grow to. She has won in a men’s game in a world where very few girls want to go in and fewer than them succeed. On one particular interview, she gave a very strong comment “I have been confident about myself”. As I read more and more about her she calmed me down and seems to have a way out. There was this fire and self-belief which was common in both of these women.
And so the answer was her trick self-defence.
Now just hold up the thought and consider this, if all the young girls get an opportunity to be trained to some basic level like Mary Kom, if we make them ready with self-defence training, and if we do that for an elongated time stamp, then we might be able to hit them hard and change their psychic. Let they redefine their world and take charge of their life. So next time when she want to go out she may not need her father or uncle or her boyfriend to go with her. The story of domestic violence which resides inside those closed doors may also rest in peace because our girls will be ready to face it and kill the beast in his face and stay as happy as possible.
So I immediately reached out Google “my best friend”, and to my surprise when I checked Justdial for a self-defence training there were more than 85+ options available just in Delhi. I was in a shock, it was going all around and I seemed to be among the last few to know.
I soon came out of my panic attack, as they say in Hindi ”Der aye durust aye” i.e. better late than never. I signed up for a Karate course and will be soon receiving my completion certificate.
The moment has not come yet for me to use my skill, but now when I walk on the road alone my heartbeat do not shoot up with every passing by car or a noisy bike rider. This training, of course have not killed all my fear but certainly it has given me a confidence to give a tough fight, to stay calm even in crisis and above everything this created a belief in me that I can do it. So I am now a permanent devotee to this religion of “Self-Defence” because it has completely changed my outlook towards the social fear and at some level it has also changed the perception of the people around me. Many of my friends have already followed my footstep and are really happy with the choice they made. Try it girls, you will feel the difference.
We have a tendency to delay things till it finally hurt us. But is not our safety our first priority?
If you were waiting for a wake-up call, this is it! There are enormous options in the market. Get out of your comfort zone today, see what suits you and join thousands of others who have realised this solution and have already taken their first step to a safe future.
Hey Lady!! You know what YOU can do it! Cheers!
About the Author:
Shivangi Bansal is an avid writer and self-defence advocate against violence against women in New Delhi. She shares fitness tips through her fitness blog and helps girls access the best gym in Delhi for self-defence training.
4 thoughts on “Fighting Violence Against Women in India With Self-Defence (Guest Post)”
it is useful to know, thank you
Well done on overcoming your fears and taking control of your own life through the empowerment of self-defence. I did karate for years as a child and I agree it is a good way of feeling more confident in that particular situation. I hope more women discover this because I think it’s terribly sad that so many women fear this.
MY Book “Self defense for Everyday” is available for free at Amazon’s lending library. It can also be purchased for $2.99.
It contains an exercise for each day. There are pictures that help explain the stances and techniques. The ideas are easy to learn and can be practiced alone or with a partner or a group.
Self defense for women is different than men’s defense. My wish is that my work might help just one women in India or any other country who feels alone and afraid.
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