There was a brief period from about 35 to 49/50 where I truly felt like “an athlete”. It was a revelation to me because from birth to about 30, I was anything but an athlete. Me of the “I hated gym when I was young and I smoked as a tween (shudder)”. Me of the “I almost failed volleyball in Grade 9” and “I couldn’t manage to run a 5K when I was about 27”.
Finishing my first 10k in a chilly run, then my first half marathon in Victoria, BC and my first and second full marathon in Toronto, made me feel like a runner!
Participating in 3 hour spin marathons during the same week I was training for said races, made me feel like an athlete in my mid to late 30s.
Learning how to effectively swing kettlebells and realize I was good at barbell front squats made me feel super strong in my 40s.
Even as recently as 2021, continuing with my regular workout routines, throughout the pandemic, made me feel like an athlete.
Even though I continue with those routines, part of me is starting to feel like less of an athlete.
During my conditioning classes, I am pacing myself more. If I feel my hip flexor protesting after 6 reverse lunges but the workout of the day calls for 8-10, I stop at 6. Does this wisdom make me less of an athlete?
Even though I continue to run dozens of kilometres each week, I haven’t signed up for a race in a long time. Does this make me less of an athlete?
Part of me wants to be more cautious and listen to my perimenopausal rhythms and part of me wants to “be more fierce”. Step it up so I retain my athleticism in the next decade and beyond.
My tattoo on my forearm is of a pair of running shoes inside a heart. This is because exercise has been so vital to my overall mental and physical health in middle age. It has become part of my identity. A part of my identity I cherish and for which I am grateful I am able to enjoy.
So, dear readers, I’m wondering when did you first feel like an athlete? Also, if you have felt that feeling ebb and flow, how have you attempted to give it a boost when it needs it?
