The feminist philosopher Kate Manne recently wrote Is Resilience a Problem? It’s on her Substack but it’s not subscriber-only.
If you have a minute, go read it and let me know what you think.
Kate asks, “…is resilience, far from being the solution to all our ills, actually part of the problem? Does the natural elasticity of human well-being prevent us from hanging onto our justified grief, fear, and anger? Does it stop us from feeling what we ought to about unconscionable states of affairs, and thus helping to assuage, protest, prevent them?”
She clearly captured some worries I’ve had about resiliency in the face of very bad things. I say this as a person who identifies as resilient. I’m an unreasonably calm and happy person. It’s my base-level disposition. I worry. I can be anxious. But as those who read the blog know, I rarely lose sleep over those worries. Sleep is my super power.
I recently posted on Facebook about the mismatch between the evils nearby at home in North America– Trump’s coup, the attack on trans people, the detaining of people without due process, the gutting of international aid, the attack on public health, the threats to Canada and I could go on– and how much I’m enjoying my research leave in Aotearoa, reading, writing, and riding my bike. It feels unreal frankly.
A Facebook friend commented sarcastically, well, that’s the important thing, that you’re sleeping well.
And of course, it’s not.
But just like the depressed person who is sad in the face of happy or neutral circumstances, I think I’m often okay even the world is falling apart. Partly that’s because I’m pretty well insulated. I have a good, secure job and I’m surrounded by friends and family.
I do however have a pretty strong sense of injustice. Family members say I could tone that down. It’s not my country after all. Not my election or my political mess. But of course it’s not that simple. Thanks to my career, I have a lot of American friends and colleagues. I have trans friends in the United States who I’m worried about. Canada isn’t that far away and out economic future is closely linked to that of the US. And then there’s the threats the US of taking over Canada. And the effects Trumps actions have on the world at large, closing USAID, threats to take over Gaza, Panama Canal and Greenland, to hand the Ukraine over to Russia. All awful.
And yet, I’m sleeping well. There’s a lack of alignment between the terrible things and my emotional reaction.
There’s a paper I read many years ago, Love and Death, that’s stuck with me. Don Moller philosophically examines how quickly people bounce back from the death of a much-loved spouse. Again, there’s that mismatch between resiliency and the things we value. He considers reasons to regret our resiliency.
The trick I’ve come to think about is considering ways to put your resiliency to good use. If you can sleep when others aren’t, even if you agree objectively about how bad things are, maybe you can use that time and energy to find ways to fight back. If it comes to the US attempting to annex Canada, ether whether through economic force, military force or influencing our elections, or a mix of all three, the resistance will need resilient people.
It’s okay to both find joy and fight back.
How are you holding up? What’s your strategy for balancing standing up for what’s right with living your life? I know this sounds a bit overwrought and earnest, but these are the times we’re in.
